Have you ever wanted to slap someone across the face with a cold fish? No? I certainly have. Maybe I’m just weird like that. I’ve often thought about picking up a huge ocean roamer by its tail and doing a sledgehammer style swing ending with a resounding slap across an unsuspecting human cheek.
Then I was on the receiving end of a cold fish slap while scuba diving. Completely surrounded by a shoal of blue stripe grouper. Fish left, right, top and bottom. Packed in there. Started pushing fish away…. then SLAP…. straight across the face. Kinda scaley. Kinda slimy. Kinda squishy. Kinda fishy. Everything I imagined.
Do I still want to slap someone in the face with a cold fish? Oh, hell yeah. Now more than ever.